I got "tagged" for 25 Things About Myself. The first item that came to mind was, "I have cancer."
Rats! The first thing? That certainly isn't singing the same tune as my Role Model post. So, for the moment, I'm not doing the list. I need to get my head to talk to my psyche. Or maybe I'll do the list and drop, "I've got cancer" to No. 25. Is that cheating?
You may have been wondering what happened to my colour coded Daily Journal. (Or, more likely, you may not.) My symptoms became so regular and predictable, I gave it up. Now, suddenly, I have a whole new set of symptoms, irregular and random.
There's the 8-hour fever and chills syndrome (twice). There is the 1-3-day insomnia syndrome (I get a lot of reading done, but it's annoying). There are leg pains that come outside of the 5-day period to which they are allotted (days 2 through 6 after chemo). The "blockage" pain (at least I didn't rush off to emergency this time). The not-eating syndrome. That's my favourite.
Yes, it is cheating. Interesting that when you think of your head talking to your psyche, you're leaving your body out of the conversation. You are intensely, if temporarily, involved in a very intrusive treatment process. It isn't who you are, but it is a big fact about you now, for an extended period of time. Maybe it isn't that you have cancer, but that you are in treatment for (against) cancer, that is number 1 on the list.
ReplyDeleteCame from my friend, who replied by e-mail. Margot